WTF! * U.S.A. 2017 Dir: Peter Herro. 80 mins
So it’s come to this…the first line in this witless, charmless latter-day slasher, is indeed “WTF”, spoken by a topless woman drenched in gore following an off-camera slaughter. It will be repeated throughout the tediously profane script, sometimes during endless scenes of the obnoxious characters shouting and swearing at each other in the face of mortal danger.
When Perez Hilton isn’t the worst thing about your movie, something has gone badly wrong…Rich kids have a toss-up to spend their Spring Break in Hawaii or at an ominous cabin in the woods: guess which one they opt for? Typical character-building banter is “You guys still haven’t done anal?” Everyone lusts after blonde bombsite Bonnie (Andrea Hunt), and everyone is surprised that the haunted Rachel (Callie Ott) never told them about surviving a massacre years earlier. After patronising the local “hillbillies”, these odious oxygen thieves are gradually offed by a guessable “mystery” killer in feeble murder set pieces (including a notably weak castration). A rare moment of amusement in this fun-free experience involves a horribly shallow female character freaking out at the state of her face after being attacked by the killer…and thus failing to notice her assailant returning to set her head on fire. You’ll be rooting for the killer all the way.
Review by Steven West